rftminges:

this is the weirdest job app i’ve ever filled out



Sep 30    138573
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aidn:

i bet if police dogs knew the police were racist they would quit



Sep 30    64530
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bikinipowerbottom:

billiamswheatdown:

ladygagarbage:

when you masturbate twice on the same day

image

When you finger yourself while masturbating

image

when you try to suck your dick and you break your ribs

image



Sep 30    213644
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strawberryalien:

kidzbop is gonna be like “my anaconda don’t want none unless u like fun, hun!!”

"oh my gosh. look at her heart!"



Sep 30    163305
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zabsofnightvale:

you know you’ve achieved true greatness when the advertisement before your video is FOR your video



Sep 30    64922
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billiondollarbaby:

I can’t wait for winter because that’s when all mosquitoes die and go to hell where they belong



Sep 30    121413
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riplogic:

*loses drink in scotland* where did my Glasgow



Sep 30    80084
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madison-paige-phaniels:

isolatedsystem:

iwishihadafather:

when british people say “maths” i laugh because thats fucking stupid

when american people say “math” i laugh because thats fucking stupid

when teachers say math i cry because i’m fucking stupid



Sep 30    556661
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starrysleeper:

trillow:

remember when the world ended last year

are you talking about the 21st of December or that time Tumblr crashed for four hours



Sep 30    530117
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thesassycat:

sluttybitch2007:

The rest of the space is going to be pretty pissed when they see this. 

did you google how to take a screen shot



Sep 30    314475
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LG